The Tale of Cockaigne

In the time of Cockaigne I went to Rome and saw the plant hanging by a silk thread, I saw the man with burned feet who could outrun a horse, and a carriage draped with silver, swords, and metals for all. There was a young ass with a sharp eye who pursued two passing hares, and a little plant, on which sweets were growing. There I saw a lean goat which carried about a hundred car-loads of soap, and sixty loads of salt. Have I not told enough lies? There I saw a fish the size of a horse or cow, a plough ploughing without a man, and a young child of one year swimming in the river of Ratisbon to Treves. And from Treves to Strasburg, a hawk swam over the Rhine, which he had a perfect right to do. I heard fishes make such a song with each other, that it resounded as far as heaven, and sweet honey flowed from a deep valley at the top of a high mountain. I saw a bird escape its nest, only to fly again to its mother waiting for it. There I saw a maiden pull out the juice from a tree’s wood like it were wine from a glass. I saw two wolves chained to a the ground, and two doves flying above them.

There I saw the king and the richest man in the country argue about a young daughter’s indecent waiter and his kiss, a man dragging metal plates from his waist, and a magnificent walled garden with a half open gate. I saw a 17 year-old daughter with three musicians by her side signing her every move. There I saw a splendid carriage driving itself down an alleyway, a man signing from the rooftop of a building, a beautiful and talkative young painter painting the top of an umbrella with a brilliant yellow, and the stunning dressings of a young woman in a high window nearly out of sight. There was a woman whose face looked as though she was flattened by a press, and a kitten who scratched a man who was burned from the sun, then drank milk from a teacup.

And these were strange things. I saw two crows which were used to mow a field, and I saw flies making whole shapes, and a tight old woman sporting with young handsome men; myself talking into the air, two children with two of children of their own, and frogs walking as a man would.

There I saw two mice consecrating a bishop, and two cats playing with a tongue. Then a bucket of snails broke open and they together killed a furious lion. I saw a woman with a beard; and two sucking children held to their mother. And four horses were standing in a yard eating corn as sport, and two goats were making a fire, and a cow shot bread into an oven. Then a cock crowed, Cock-a-doodle-doo! This story is all told, Cock-a-doodle-doo!